Tag Archives: roommate issues

Roommate 101

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Whether you’re used to sharing your space or this will be your first experience, moving into your college dorm room and meeting your roommate is likely to be a nervewracking experience, even if you’re moving in with a friend! Here are a few tips to help you be the best roommate you can be. 

Be Friendly

First things first, be friendly. Even if you’re shy it’s important for you to make an effort. If you’re rooming with someone you’ve never met, try reaching out to them before you arrive on campus. Become social media friends, plan what things you can each bring for the room, and get acquainted. Not only will it make sharing space more comfortable but it will help to have someone to wander campus with!

Now that you’re friends, here are some things to keep in mind to allow for peaceful cohabitation!

Communicate 

Communication is key. Try to keep each other in the loop about all sorts of things. Share your schedules, check-in with each other before letting other people in your shared space, give fair warning about pulling all-nighters.  As you get more comfortable with each other, try to let them know if you’re having a tough day or aren’t feeling well. Even the tiny details about yourself can make a big difference in your living situation. 

Address Any Issues 

If you are having issues or feeling uncomfortable about something, speak up. Usually simply addressing a concern leads to a quick solution as long as you treat each other respectfully. If you need extra help or advice, talk to your RA or dean. 

Compromise 

In case you have a disagreement, compromise with each other! We can’t always get our own way so be sure to come to a solution that works well for both of you.

Set Boundaries 

Make sure you give yourselves some boundaries. Whether it’s wanting your own space, needing quiet after a certain time, sharing food or clothes, or any number of things, it’s important to set some ground rules so everyone is comfortable. 

Pick Your Battles 

There are bound to be times where you will get annoyed or disagree with your roommate. Before you get mad and get in a fight, think about the situation and ask yourself if it’s worth arguing over. There will definitely be times where you will need to talk the situation out but if you can, take a step back, take the high road, and learn how to let the little things go. 

Be Aware Of Your Bad Habits 

The older we get the more self-awareness we gather. Becoming aware of some of your less positive habits can be a real benefit when sharing living space. If you know you have a tendency to be messy or leave all the lights on you can try and be more mindful of those things. 

Wear Headphones 

One of the best things you can do to keep a positive roommate relationship is to invest in a quality pair of headphones. Be considerate and wear them when you’re listening to music or watching a movie whether it’s late at night or not. We even recommend wearing them while you study so your roommate won’t feel like they’re bothering you.

You Don’t Always Have To Hangout

Just because you’re roommates doesn’t mean you always have to be together. You already live together, so it’s okay to have space from each other. If you love hanging out, that’s great! But if you want to have dinner without each other or have a different group of friends, that’s totally ok. In fact, it can create an even healthier friendship if you have some time apart. 

There are millions of ways to have a positive and healthy roommate relationship, these are just some of our suggestions we hope you find helpful. Keep these tips in mind throughout the year and remember to treat your roommate the way you would want to be treated. Having a roommate is a great experience. Who knows, your roommate could end up being a lifelong friend!

Note: Be sure you carefully read your communications from Student Life and regularly check the Fall Campus Plan webpage to stay up-to-date with the COVID-19 safety precautions PUC will be enforcing. 

 

Three Ways to Solve Issues with Your Roommate

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By Kaleb Zenk

Where’d all the dishes come from?
Rooming with someone we don’t know particularly well can leave us at odds: stressed out, worried, and full of anxiety! We take our space seriously, and rightfully so, but it can be especially difficult when two individuals’ habits and behaviors collide.

The truth is, you will probably have more than one roommate during the course of your life, and why not learn to overcome some of those obstacles now? It is a journey of the most rewarding kind to learn how to better communicate and navigate possible issues that might arise while having a roommate.

Take on this mantra to have a better relationship with your roommate: Strategize more. Stress less.

ETIQUETTE 1: COMMUNICATION
The most critical part of being a better roommate is to communicate your feelings clearly, even if it might seem out of your comfort zone to be assertive and ask for things you need. The bottom line is half of the room is your space, too. You must speak up if something is bothering you because allowing problems to pile up can only hinder the initial jump into better communication.

Each person has a different set of idiosyncrasies or behaviors that are particular only to them. Many are not acutely aware of these behaviors, which can create a perpetual cycle of bad habits. How then would you tell your roommate what they’re doing is driving you nuts?

For one, compose yourself and have a conversation with your roommate so they can begin correcting certain behaviors they might be unaware of. Talk to your roommate before the end of the semester. Not only will the issues between you and your roommate pile up, but also finals will pile up, creating even more stress and tension.

If this doesn’t work and you are desperate to solve the issues between you and your roommate, talking to your resident assistant (RA) and asking them to mediate is advisable.

ETIQUETTE 2: BOUNDARY SETTING
Again, one of the most important actions you can take to have a better relationship with your roommate is to communicate earlier rather than later. One way you can streamline the communication process is to start setting boundaries which keeps both you and your roommate accountable.

Who’s going to clean the dishes on what day? Who’s going to clean the bathroom? Who’s going to replenish the paper in the printer? Who’s going to vacuum? There are a lot of responsibilities you don’t necessarily think of when it’s just your space, but now that someone is living three feet away from you, it’s time to start thinking strategically how you can accomplish all the tasks without having to remind each other.

One way you can accomplish and share some of these tasks is to create a calendar both you and your roommate can visibly see.

ETIQUETTE 3: RESPECT YOUR ROOMMATE 
Undoubtedly, you and your roommate will have issues. And this is what we have to say about that: Strategize more. Stress less.

Don’t let the actions of your roommate affect your attitude and happiness elsewhere. It’s easy to take that tension outside of the room and vent about it to your friends, but most importantly, what does that say about yourself and your communication habits?

How you talk about your roommate to other people may instill a set of bad habits in yourself, which could reflect poorly on you. If you’re complaining about your roommate’s habits and behaviors instead of choosing to tackle them in a straightforward manner, others may think you can’t solve issues with them, or worse, your friends may think you’re bad mouthing them too!

Keep the annoyances of your roommate out of the conversation and focus on how you can solve them privately. Learning to talk one on one with your roommate will help you be a more positive individual and possibly learn to like your roommate! We tend to like people who listen to us and are able to effectively solve issues together. Let the strategy in your dorm room affect how you become a better overall communicator.